The Test We Receive to Grow
It is so easy to form the perspective that we just need to remove the dislikes we saw in our previous relationship — the things that made us angry, the personalities that set us off, and the situations that evolved that we’d say provoked us to behave the way we did. We look to the external world to blame for why we are the way we are. We hand over emotional authority to what happens outside of us.
But what if these are actually tests? What if they’re opportunities to reveal the inner work we need to do?
We wonder why people always seem to use us — while at the same time wishing someone would come save us. We wonder why our children are rude to us — while treating our own parents with disrespect. We feel angry, yet continue to attract situations that trigger the same emotional reactions, as if to draw out what still lives inside.
We see the world from our own lens — and feel frustrated when others don’t see it the same way. Why can’t they just agree with how we see things?
And yet, when we start letting go of the need to control, there’s less that feels out of control. When we start giving more, we start receiving more. Maybe our external reality is just a reflection of our internal one.
Kundalini teaches that our tikkun is our opportunity to repair. To correct. To grow into who we’re meant to be, so we can actually receive what we desire. We might judge someone based on how we see them — but they see themselves completely differently. Our judgment doesn’t change them — it only changes us. It becomes our own inner conflict.
Everything we label good or bad is just in comparison to something else. And all the worries we carry today could be gone tomorrow with a simple change in perspective or circumstance. A relationship could end — and then a conversation starts with a stranger at the park, the gym, a café. Something new, unanalysed, unfiltered, just present.
If we heal the emotion, we change the trigger. If we change the behaviour, the responses around us change too.
We ask the universe to fix things. We pray for change. But we forget — if the creator gave everyone free will, then asking for someone else to change serves no purpose. All we can do is ask to be changed.
A maths equation has a fixed answer. If we don’t change the number we’re putting in, we’ll never get the solution we’re looking for.
Like David Ghiyam says, if we want a 1000-watt life, we don’t get there being a 600-watt bulb. We have to become more. We don’t get there by doing — we get there by being. Change happens from within, not from without. Our world reflects what we hold inside.
So say to yourself:
“I am worthy.”
Keep saying it — because you are.