With such a strong desire to win at any cost, the malicious parent will search for anything—social media posts, interactions, or photos—that can be twisted to paint you in a bad light. You should expect surveillance and monitoring of your social media accounts. Some posts or stories may be downloaded and presented in court, with the malicious parent spinning their own narrative to suit their claims. By using audience-tracking apps, you may notice unusual activity, such as the other parent consistently viewing your posts. This demonstrates that they are more focused on winning than on what is in the best interests of the children. However, damaging social media posts that paint you in a bad light can be used against you, especially if they portray you as reckless or irresponsible. Nights out drinking, immature posts, or venting online may not seem like a big deal, but in court, they can be twisted to question your character. Also, you shouldn’t be partying and becoming involved in reckless behaviour if you have children, they need a parent who has their shit together. Just because you are a parent does not mean you should have full custody, especially if your behaviour may be labelled as damaging to a child’s safety and security.
Never post anything about the other parent that could be seen as defamatory or painting them in a negative light. You can bet that this will be used against you, even if you are telling the truth. Keep all text messages, emails, and bank transfers polite and appropriate. Assume that anything you send will be collected as evidence, just as you should collect theirs in case of false allegations. Parents have been heavily criticised for labelling child support payments with names like "Witch" or saving their former partner’s name in their phone as "Bitch Face." Although the other parent may, in reality, be a nasty piece of work, the court will see your behaviour as contributing to conflict. Courts prioritise the best interests of the children, and personal opinions about the other parent are seen as irrelevant and damaging.
Do not stalk their social media posts either. It is a true injustice that when a man views a public account, it may be considered stalking, yet if a woman does the same, it is often laughed off by police. This is a glaring bias within law enforcement, which seems to jump at every female allegation for what may be considered abuse—perhaps because public scrutiny focuses on male violence, or perhaps because officers have been instructed not to record similar reports from men. We can all agree that police have to meet a quoter of driving fines, I wonder if this applies to other avenues in the justice system. One would assume that a business is invested in making profits, no? Such injustice truly destroys public confidence in our justice system.
If you found this post helpful and want to take your understanding even deeper, check out the Malicious Intent and Tactics Guide. It’s a practical, eye-opening resource designed to help you recognise patterns of manipulation, control, and emotional harm — especially in high-conflict separation. Whether you're navigating family court or simply seeking clarity, this guide offers the insight and tools you need to stay grounded, protected, and informed.